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'You're in the wrong place'

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As a regular massage guest you experience a lot. Usually they are nice experiences, but the other day something rather extraordinary happened to me. At the end I was bid farewell with the words "Please don't come back".

But how did it come to this rough departure? Place of the event: Bangkok. The "Sabai Sabai Massage" in a harmless street, surrounded by various international hotels. A massage salon that looks like hundreds of others from the outside: In front of the entrance, a couple of masseuses are sitting, hammering on their cell phones and shouting "massage, massage..." to the passing tourists.

Since I was in the hotel next door and just felt like getting a massage, I went in there - without any expectations, except to get an oil massage. Inside, a menu was put under my nose: "Oil-Massage 500 Baht", I took. And I thought, actually a bit expensive for a restaurant with a very average interior.

Then we started rather unspectacularly, the back and legs were massaged and after about half an hour it was time to turn around. Hardly five minutes later I was asked if I knew the "Special Services". Hmm no, I do not know them. Then I was informed that these were among other things hand job, blow job and sex. Oh well - well, handjob is offered more often, the latter only in more obvious salons and then also at the beginning and not at half time.

A little expensive, this hand job...

Well, I could have been enthusiastic about a handjob, but when I found out that it should cost 1000 Baht more (the usual price is 500), I declined. And from then on, the atmosphere was only going downhill. I was then informed that she does not get any money from the massage itself - that goes to the boss - and only earns money from the additional services. And anyway, this is a shop for additional services and I am in the wrong place. I see.

So obviously I was not able to sniff out the (overpriced) business model in time. I'm sorry - or not. Surprisingly, she did the massage, growling but still finishing it.

On the way to the door we had exchanged some unkind words. She didn't think it was necessary to check out the competition and just told me not to come here anymore. No problem, I know enough alternatives that are nicer, cheaper and nicer and you won't get a kick in the butt in the end.

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